African American women of 32nd Co.,Women's Army Corps standing at attention during training at Fort Huachuca. fotog: Charles E. Steinheimer, 1943
It’s almost like a rite of passage. The stupid things we do afford us with battle scars we can tell younger women. Younger in spirit and maturity but sadly not necessarily age. What boggles my mind are the scars we give ourselves over and over and over again. The “pleasure filled” mindless pain.
1. Dating UNAVAILABLE men: A few weeks ago I wrote something that needs to be clarified. I stated that most men upon us meeting them are actively dating. And hopefully women want them. I went as far as to say; that nobody wants what nobody wants. And if you run across a man NO woman wants, RUN.
Upon meeting a man he MAY have a “friend girl” or two or four. ”friend girl” means that YOUR gentlemen caller is tryna get all up on YOUR weekend schedule. It may even mean that he’s too lazy to multi-task. It got cold and tag, friend girl was the last one hangin on, and so she’s “it”. A man with an ACTUAL girlfriend isn’t giving up weekly Fridays and Saturdays. He’s not living with someone. His time is pretty much his own, save for friend girl and/or his very own “friendly” roster.
But he isn’t married, engaged or otherwise in a committed relationship. Sadly sometimes men fake the metaphoric relationship status funk, and if your admirer isn’t honest, it may take some sleuthing and just plain old intuition (and because you’re multi-tasking with your legs closed), emotions aren’t involved. You find out that homeboy hasn’t been honest and is otherwise not single, you bounce. It’s that simple. Newsflash for the “relationship status purists”; separated is STILL MARRIED. It’s so married in fact, the reason most men are separated are because THEY NEED A BREAK. Why in God’s creation would you think he’s a prime pick for a serious one on one with you? I’ve also been told that there are women who go after married men; (In my dear grandma’s sarcastically naive voice) I KNOW THAT IS NOT THE CASE, so no need to even explore this mythical phenomenon.
2. Allowing Men To Date You In Your Home/Apt/Condo: I had a “meeting in the ladies room” with a few women this weekened and I’m deeply saddened to know that men have somehow gotten a false impression that its ok to take you out a couple of times and then romance your a!ss in your own home. I even know of a few first dates I’ve read in the blogeshere, where a man took a lady out “in her house” or worse yet “in his house”. This is UNACCEPTABLE, not even in inclement weather. If there’s a blizzard outside, his a!ss shouldn’t even be venturing over to your neck of the woods. Ladies, this is a big no-no and further impacts the 90 day rule (87 day rule, for you ladies who hate rules). Now, men ARE naturally curious. We are where we live and a man who is interested in you is going to want to see where you live. If you are so inclined on the third or fourth date, have him come in for some kool-aid BEFORE you go to that much awaited indie film followed with the writer and director discussion. That way he isn’t tempted and you’re still celibate. And more importantly, HE IS DATING YOU. You are getting to know him in a variety of environments that have very little if anything to do with your couch.
3. Not Taking The Time To Date Yourself. This is really important, because women who hate being alone, seem to be the ones who perpetually ARE, always and forever just like the Luther Vandross song. They’re in and out of surfacy relationships. They’re having se!x way too soon, after which time they always seem to end up hating the men they dated; ex’setc. I call it space filling. Buffer dating, whereby that time should be spent getting to know YOU. If you honestly aren’t comfortable alone in your own skin, why would anyone elsebe comfortable hanging around it?
Hone a skill or hobby. Learn a foreign language. Travel. Do all the things you’ve always wanted to do with a man; ALONE. It not only makes you interesting and well rounded but it continues to help you frame what it is YOU want in a man.
(aside) The jury is still out about how I feel about actually MARRYING “redefining” YOURSELF in your old wedding gown, or maybe I’m still on the fence regarding Juanita Bynum II (“pronounced Juanita Bynumthe second”) doing it.
I think one thing I want to add to the dating unavailable men list is emotionally unavailable. A lot of women make the mistake of dating someone who shows you in their actions OR verbally that they are not in the place mentally to deal with a relationship or even a friendship. A lot of us out of loneliness or feeling you can change someone ignore the signs of emotional unavailability.
@ Alise..I dunno about emotionally unavailable. I think “emotionally unavailable” is higher up on the dating sabatoge list than “He really likes wasabi and ginger with his Sushi, is he gay (THIS HAPPENED TO ME A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO..im working through this-its a thing I have about food customization and “how-you-doingness!!”!)
I say all that to say. I believe upon FIRST meeting someone WE ALL SHOULD BE EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE..the problem is that when we as women se!x dudes too soon, we want the moon, the earth, the stars, “what will our kids look like” on date 5.
I think “emotional availability” is a really premature assumption in dating. When you’re actively dating, people are making decicions and choices that sometimes dont happen overnite. Emotionally unavailable is a early layer of self-protection. And i dont necessarily see this as a bad thing early on.
i dunno just a thought.
@thecbg
You have a great point, I didn’t even think about it in that way…. but I was thinking a little further in and not necessarily the first couple dates (maybe towards the latter end of those 90 days, lol)
@comebackgirl: I find myself asking those same questions. I met a guy over the weekend, he didn’t watch the superbowl, said he doesn’t like sports and he’d rather watch lifetime or movies, and the first thing i said to myself, OMG is he gay?
I agree with all 3 points. Tis all
Morning Treehouse Diva’s
Hope all is well.
I agree with all 3 rules. I had written something else but it got deleted..not sure what’s up with my posts
I agree with the list….
At this point in time, I think dating a man who says, “he’s not ready for a relationship,” would be a hinderance. It’s cool if you as the dater, is not either BUT…. at this point, I want one (doesn’t neccessarily have to be with the datee) BUT I’d like to know it’s a possiblity.
I would like to add cease and desist all relationship talk for at least 3 dates
I had an explanation for this but I’m not sure what that is sooooo im just gonna leave it at that.
Morning guys.
Morning Treehouse!
Agrees with the list as well.
Newsflash for the “relationship status purists”; separated is STILL MARRIED. It’s so married in fact, the reason most men are separated are because THEY NEED A BREAK. Why in God’s creation would you think he’s a prime pick for a serious one on one with you?
Wholeheartedly agrees. I have an associate who has been in a long term relationship with a married man. In the meantime he REFUSES to divorce his wife (helloooo McFlyyy!), had gotten her pregnant several times (miscarried all of them), lives with her and her son, and cheats on a regular basis. She is not happy and has since lost a good 5 or 6 dating years on a man who refuses to fully commit to her. She is still with him and miserable.
Apparently she is not the first he’s done this too…she’s just the first to stay as long as she has.
@ #3…Thats some gospel right there. If you can’t stand to be by yourself, and do and enjoy things by yourself…why would you think anyone else would enjoy being around you. I love to catch a movie, travel, or whatevs by my d@mn self sometimes. It’s very fun and liberating! Date yourselves ladies and gentleman…get in tune with YOUR star player (wkcite: Katt Williams).
I would like to add cease and desist all relationship talk for at least 3 dates
I had an explanation for this but I’m not sure what that is sooooo im just gonna leave it at that.
Morning guys.
Morning Ladies.
Mik…chuckling @ you already. I’mma need for you to remember.
“@ #3…Thats some gospel right there. If you can’t stand to be by yourself, and do and enjoy things by yourself…why would you think anyone else would enjoy being around you. I love to catch a movie, travel, or whatevs by my d@mn self sometimes. It’s very fun and liberating! Date yourselves ladies and gentleman…get in tune with YOUR star player (wkcite: Katt Williams).”
AMEN.
Jada I think dating a married man speaks to your integrity as a woman and your over all value system.
I just can’t believe YOU as a woman think too highly of yourself if continue involve yourself with a marriage man once you find out.
Morning,
I agree with Mik.
And please don’t reference JBII again. That foolishness scares me.
“Jada I think dating a married man speaks to your integrity as a woman and your over all value system.”
AMEN! If I hear about a woman doing this, it reminds me that she is SELFISH and that she is out to get what she wants at ANY cost.
Comeback Girl, good list.
The only thing I would add is this: Stop telling men the type of man you want. For some reason that seems to be in the top 10 questions guys will ask. Why not tell them? Because some men will conform to the type of guy you say you like…just to get with you…and then once you realize he’s nothing like the man you REALLY want, you could be caught all up in something you don’t want to be in.
If asked that question–keep the answer simple. I usually say, I want a man who is a man of his word and leave it at that.
Jada I think dating a married man speaks to your integrity as a woman and your over all value system.
I just can’t believe YOU as a woman think too highly of yourself if continue involve yourself with a marriage man once you find out.
Hallelujer! I agree Mik A Doodle.
new post: http://blackfemmefatale.wordpress.com/2009/02/01/jolies-roster-update-a-manicane-me-thinks-not/
HOLLA!
Nicki I wrote a post a while back ago about meeting a married dude but I didn’t notice the ring on his finger when i handed him my number and jetted out.
when he called me the first thing he said was im married didn’t u see my ring?? I was like nope sure didn’t (all i saw was finness lol). He had the nerves to say lets be friends. I was like dude what we gone do get together with your WIFE and play a game of jinga???
I thinks not. good bye sir
“: had the nerves to say lets be friends. I was like dude what we gone do get together with your WIFE and play a game of jinga???”
I am DEAD…. Because he owned the bawls to ask you that, it tells me some dumb woman went for it.
He had the nerves to say lets be friends. I was like dude what we gone do get together with your WIFE and play a game of jinga???
*Weak*
I read that post too Mik.
Jada did you ever read Mr slish version of that story?
hella funny
@ Akua “@comebackgirl: I find myself asking those same questions. I met a guy over the weekend, he didn’t watch the superbowl, said he doesn’t like sports and he’d rather watch lifetime or movies, and the first thing i said to myself, OMG is he gay?
”
Dear Jesus be appropriate cable television for men. I do this ALL THE TIME. To the point that its comical. But I do wonder how much of my “is he gay” is killing the roster slowly.
@ Sunny “At this point in time, I think dating a man who says, “he’s not ready for a relationship,” would be a hinderance. It’s cool if you as the dater, is not either BUT…. at this point, I want one (doesn’t neccessarily have to be with the datee) BUT I’d like to know it’s a possiblity.
”
I still am on the fence about this emotional availability/unavailability thing. I know sometimes I use “Im not ready” for people Im clearly not interested in. I think if the man is with the right woman…he get’s his @zz ready real quick. All else to me is just getting to know. Now I don’t advocate hanging on to relationship pixie..if his actions and words are telling you, he;s not ready..i venture to say he’s not ready nor is he INTERESTED. Movie anyone?
@ Mikster “I would like to add cease and desist all relationship talk for at least 3 dates”
Me too. It doesn’t come up at least till date 4 or 5. The word relationship. And im not even talking bout “imagine me and you and you and me..so happy together, unless he brings it up”.
@ Zsa Zsa “Wholeheartedly agrees. I have an associate who has been in a long term relationship with a married man. In the meantime he REFUSES to divorce his wife (helloooo McFlyyy!), had gotten her pregnant several times (miscarried all of them), lives with her and her son, and cheats on a regular basis. She is not happy and has since lost a good 5 or 6 dating years on a man who refuses to fully commit to her. She is still with him and miserable.”
More gospel. Now I think I told this story about my “seperated” yet STILL married man, who was out of the house. Back when I was oh so young and dumb 24. And I was just stuck on stupid. The divorce was messy. He was hidding property-houses that he was buying and putting them into relatives names..and then I said, wait a minute. THIS IS A CHARACTER FLAW. If he’s treating a fellow yaya like this..he doesn’t think THAT MUCH MORE OF ME.
@ Jac..”And please don’t reference JBII again. That foolishness scares me.”
I had to do it mayne.
@ Sheila “Stop telling men the type of man you want. For some reason that seems to be in the top 10 questions guys will ask. Why not tell them? Because some men will conform to the type of guy you say you like…just to get with you…and then once you realize he’s nothing like the man you REALLY want, you could be caught all up in something you don’t want to be in.
If asked that question–keep the answer simple. I usually say, I want a man who is a man of his word and leave it at that.
”
I never really thought of that. I feel like I’m a good reader and it does all surface. A man can’t fake the funk but for so long. Usually two weeks tops and you start to see the reveal. Luckily again, keeping your legs closed for at least a couple of months insure you actually see the reveal clearly.
@Comebackgirl: Girl I think im picking my roster off one by one eliminating them in order of who is more gay.
@mikki: when can i get the next part to your story?
@ Mik…I didn’t read Mr. Slish’s version. I’ll check it out later.
“@mikki: when can i get the next part to your story?”
oh wow I have a fan !! lol
hmmm ok lemmie think I will work on it tonight!
yup
“he get’s his @zz ready real quick. All else to me is just getting to know. Now I don’t advocate hanging on to relationship pixie..if his actions and words are telling you, he;s not ready..i venture to say he’s not ready nor is he INTERESTED. Movie anyone?”
’tis true… with my experience though, if a man has told me in the beginning, he doesn’t falter from it any later on. I’m learning tho… it could’ve been due to me giving him the bizness too early on.
I know this may be blaspheme, but I think I SUCK at multitasking… someone always comes out dominating.
@ Nick I haven’t really tried my hand at multitasking lately. I do not have the patience or the energy right now.
@mikki: Of course im a fan! I love a good read. and silly me is reading when i should be writing..lol.
@nicki: i commented on your blog but it seems all my posts are going to spam, can u check to see if u got it.
@nicki: u gotta break up your energy. that way u can multitask. If you mark them 1-10 of course someone will be on top, make em all 3’s and keep your interest in each pretty level..
“I know this may be blaspheme, but I think I SUCK at multitasking… someone always comes out dominating.
”
too me it depends..if you are seeing one person more..then that is possible-AND YOU AREN’T MULTITASKING. but usually its because we all like routine. I know I do, and when Im favoring one roster participant over the other..i try and mix it up more you know.
relationship rule 4.5003 (made 2 seconds ago)
Its perfectly ok to NOT divulge in multi tasking, as long as you aren’t pixie dusting it up when you go on first or 2nd dates. ie if you find on date 2 he is just not that interested or vise vera KEEP IT MOVING, do not entertain subjects that you know will lead to disasters/distractions JUST because you only have one member on the team. Gracefully bow out and find a good match for you.
“haven’t really tried my hand at multitasking lately. I do not have the patience or the energy right now”
@Jay Boogie: I can understand that.
@Akua: I got ya covered doll… it’s all clear. thanks for telling me.
“u gotta break up your energy. that way u can multitask. If you mark them 1-10 of course someone will be on top, make em all 3’s and keep your interest in each pretty level..”
This is true… I think my problem is, once I find something I don’t like, I kick him off quick. LOL
“too me it depends..if you are seeing one person more..then that is possible-AND YOU AREN’T MULTITASKING. but usually its because we all like routine. I know I do, and when Im favoring one roster participant over the other..i try and mix it up more you know.”
It’s all the same comment that I made for Akua. I have an issue with cutting them off QUICK. Pray for this faulty personality trait!!!
@mikki: amen to that rule!!
“Its perfectly ok to NOT divulge in multi tasking, as long as you aren’t pixie dusting it up when you go on first or 2nd dates. ie if you find on date 2 he is just not that interested or vise vera KEEP IT MOVING, do not entertain subjects that you know will lead to disasters/distractions JUST because you only have one member on the team. Gracefully bow out and find a good match for you.”
Oh yes.. I got this one covered. Thank you chica.
I saw Mr. Divorcee’ yesterday at church… I am pretty sure he saw me, but I didnt’ make a special effort to go speak. I didn’t feel I needed to.
My lower self esteemed friend told me I was mean.
@nicki: I have that issue as well. Im quick to drop one and keep it moving. However if i see qualities i like in more then one then u gotta juggle em. and as long as there are no “COOKIES” involved and you are just dating all should be well.
It’s just a way to keep your options open cause transference of energy drives me crazy
Good Morning all!! Hope everyone had a great weekend. Great post Comeback! I like all the points and Naturally Alise on the Emotionally Unavailable men!
“@nicki: I have that issue as well. Im quick to drop one and keep it moving. However if i see qualities i like in more then one then u gotta juggle em. and as long as there are no “COOKIES” involved and you are just dating all should be well. ”
Girl, YES.. I’m learning that no cookies makes things so much easier… including the keep it moving part.
hey Holister!
“relationship rule 4.5003 (made 2 seconds ago)
Its perfectly ok to NOT divulge in multi tasking, as long as you aren’t pixie dusting it up when you go on first or 2nd dates. ie if you find on date 2 he is just not that interested or vise vera KEEP IT MOVING, do not entertain subjects that you know will lead to disasters/distractions JUST because you only have one member on the team. Gracefully bow out and find a good match for you.
”
Mikster..i sho don’t appreciate you “addendumizing” my multi-task dat a!ss rule.
BUT …i agree. I dont think you need to have dudes hang around JUST TO HANG AROUND. In fact I just fired a roster dude yesterday.
The idea is that you are constantly meeting people and adding and subtracting to your all star line up.
Multi-tasking IS NOT ABOUT COLLECTING MEN.
Jesus be some clarification up in dis peice.
“Oh yes.. I got this one covered. Thank you chica”
yea I saw that right after I posted lol.
But seriously Nicki what type of stuff do you kick guys off the list for? I mean sometimes they need to be kicked off OR you could be going over the top….
tell the treehouse my dear…. what erks you
Hey Nicki! Glad you gave ole dude the finga!
Hi Holster..thanks.
Hey comeback! How was that workout?
Holly how was your party
“The idea is that you are constantly meeting people and adding and subtracting to your all star line up.
Multi-tasking IS NOT ABOUT COLLECTING MEN.”
Amen and cheers!! To this, Comeback!
@Mik- The party was fun girl!! We had a good time… BB came through for a little met my undergrad buddies and played some Dominoes…
How was your wknd chickie!?
Hey Hollies!
Great points ladies!
Hey Jada! You do anything fun this wknd?
“The idea is that you are constantly meeting people and adding and subtracting to your all star line up.
Multi-tasking IS NOT ABOUT COLLECTING MEN.
Jesus be some clarification up in dis peice.”
Amen. Multi-tasking has nothing to do with that ..WHY HAS EVERYONE turned this into a dirty word…
@ Jolie- I think because some people are using it for the wrong purpose… they are using it to COLLECT not to deduct and add…
Hey Jada! You do anything fun this wknd?
I went to a step-show this weekend Hollies. It was cute. What you get into dear?
“WHY HAS EVERYONE turned this into a dirty word…”
Because if you turn it into a dirty word, it keeps you doing what you;ve safely always done. However and wherefore, im not a “hater”..if slowing the party down with one man quickly works..then WORK IT.
“Hey Nicki! Glad you gave ole dude the finga!”
Stank you ver’ much Holister!
“But seriously Nicki what type of stuff do you kick guys off the list for? I mean sometimes they need to be kicked off OR you could be going over the top….
tell the treehouse my dear…. what erks you”
Mikster: Okay… so you know I’ve been doing this Internet dating thing for about three weeks… some of them have gotten some phone calls…. and some of them can’t make it past email stage (and yes, there is a stage for this thang with me. LOL)
Things that have gotten guys cut so far:
1. Planning our future on the first phone call
2. Basically falling in love after the first conversation
3. Asking to see me on my “video cam.”
4. Planning a trip to see me after talking ONE
TIME
This one guy I met, who lives in Cali will be coming to New York to train for a new job and wants to pay for me to come visit him there. He’s so far, offered to “buy me something from Victoria Secret, but didnt’ know my size.
I THINK THIS IS WEIRD.
Plus his proper california accent is a turnoff. LOL
Amen. Multi-tasking has nothing to do with that ..WHY HAS EVERYONE turned this into a dirty word…
Who turned it into a dirty word? I agrees with multitasking…I’m gearing up for Spring!
I don’t think it’s a dirty word… I just think I suck at it bc I can’t keep a roster… I elminate FAST. LOL
Heck, some don’t even make it to a date 2… Look at Mr. Divorcee’ (my latest real life date!)
@nicki: what he think because he traveled across the country he’s going to get some COOKIES? Please!
Tell him u can buy your OWN panties..gotta do better then that…
I fear when I decide to jump back in Nick…that I’ll have similar issues. My tolerance for foolishness wanes with each man.
I agree we need clarification up in this piece
When I think of multi taskin I think of having team members that you KNOW you will more than likely have sitting on the bench without a chance of playin
I guess I always feel like if u have such a “LIST” of high quality men why would you be single??
assuming we know what high quality is.
Holly my weekend was pretty chill been with S all weekend, we watched the game at his aunts and uncles house, it was a good time.
I think the only person that I have HEARD of actually multi tasking correctly was Holly
“what he think because he traveled across the country he’s going to get some COOKIES? Please!
Tell him u can buy your OWN panties..gotta do better then that…”
That’s exactly what I was thinking…. plus he’s made several s3xually suggestive comments…. and I have played them off BUT why is he doing this??? We don’t even know eachother like that.
Oh, one guy eliminated himself by asking about s3x in the first five minutes of the conversation. When I told him I was celibate, he backed off like I said I have the ebola virus
@ Jada- I went home Friday and hung out with Mommy Holly for her bday! We did Spa and dinner and then went out with my cousin who’s like a sister… Then Saturday was dinner with a girlfriend and drinks with the boyfriend… Sunday was a Superbowl with Undergrad friends!!!
I miss Stepshows!!! Who won?
Nicki I don’t think there is anything wrong with your list except the web cam thing
that one is actually ok as long as 1. he has one too
and 2. he doesn’t try to whip out is dyck or ask to see you naked lol
I met one dude off bpm and we web cam’d every day until we actually saw eachother.
very innocent nothing crazy or sexual about it.
“I fear when I decide to jump back in Nick…that I’ll have similar issues. My tolerance for foolishness wanes with each man.”
Girl, YES…My tolerance is soooo slim. especially when in the first few dates, you’re most likely a representative… if your representative is f’ing up, what does that say about the real you? LOL
@Nicki: My only issue with Mr.Texas is that he says at least 5 times in one of our daily conversations that “Im sexy.” Ok I get it. but i’d much rather be beautiful. Or he’s like i’d do this to you and i’d do that to you I in turn change the subject.
@ Hollies it was a step shoe at my old HS! Lawd I saw some folks I hadn’t seen since we graduated back in 99.
This group by the name of Gamma Eta Sigma (I think) won. They did really well!
My cuz invited me cause her son goes to the HS I used to now. My baby’s growing up and stuff.
Mo’nin,
Call me shallow, but a love mistake MANY women make is getting fat/out of shape while in a relationship. Not only are you doing yourself an injustice by not taking care of your body, you’re silently sabotaging his physical attraction to you. And if the relationship fails, now you gotta work overtime to get your old body back. Don’t do it. Keep it tight ladies.
“Nicki I don’t think there is anything wrong with your list except the web cam thing
that one is actually ok as long as 1. he has one too
and 2. he doesn’t try to whip out is dyck or ask to see you naked lol
I met one dude off bpm and we web cam’d every day until we actually saw eachother.
very innocent nothing crazy or sexual about it.”
Mik: You KILT me at whip out his member. LMAO
There is one contender that is going exceedingly, abundantly above all others… we talk a lot throughout the day…. he’s a sweetheart and therefore, he’s on top.
Or he’s like i’d do this to you and i’d do that to you I in turn change the subject.
@Akua….I gives the patented Hollies blank stare on foolishness like this. They usually don’t know how to respond when they get 0 reaction from me when they start up with that BS.
Morning JSI!
Good point lady.
@Jada: Im a deff have to try that one!!
“@Nicki: My only issue with Mr.Texas is that he says at least 5 times in one of our daily conversations that “Im sexy.” Ok I get it. but i’d much rather be beautiful. Or he’s like i’d do this to you and i’d do that to you I in turn change the subject.”
AKUAAAAA: yesterday, the california guy sent me three suggestive, If I do this to you, would you do this to me texts! I have NEVER gotten those before. Complete turn off.
@Jada- I havent been to one in yrs!
@just- Hey girl! And I so agree with you! My friend and I was talking about that yesterday when we were leavingthe gym how a lot of black women dont work out and all that stuff!!
@Akua- yeah i would definitely have to give that what you talking bout willis look!
@ Hollies…sounds like you and Ma Dukes had fun!
How was the superbowl party?
My undergrad peeps are still some of my truest peeps. They are my family.
“Call me shallow, but a love mistake MANY women make is getting fat/out of shape while in a relationship. Not only are you doing yourself an injustice by not taking care of your body, you’re silently sabotaging his physical attraction to you. And if the relationship fails, now you gotta work overtime to get your old body back. Don’t do it. Keep it tight ladies.
”
i agree here too.. particularly if he met you ONE way and you lookin another.
““Call me shallow, but a love mistake MANY women make is getting fat/out of shape while in a relationship. Not only are you doing yourself an injustice by not taking care of your body, you’re silently sabotaging his physical attraction to you. And if the relationship fails, now you gotta work overtime to get your old body back. Don’t do it. Keep it tight ladies.
”
i agree here too.. particularly if he met you ONE way and you lookin another.”
MAN!
@jada: your post on your page is on point this am. I commented but of course it didn’t show up! Lol…
@holly : Im practicing my wtfuta stare now..lol
@nicki: what up with school today? doing any work? i did mine yesterday i had this crazy paper to write on capital punishment..str8 bs
“@nicki: what up with school today? doing any work? i did mine yesterday i had this crazy paper to write on capital punishment..str8 bs”
Akua: Girl, school is a thorn in my side right now. Long story short, I’m changing my major back to Criminal Justice bc I’m sick of school.. I don’t want to HAVE to go to grad school right after. The classes I’m taking now do not count toward CJ, so I’ve emailed three teachers to see if they will accept me into their classes (being that it’s the third week)… two teachers turned me down ,but one said yes. (it’s an acting class for my “arts” requirement). I am gonna go talk to someone at the school today bc I don’t know what to do….
@ Akua…I’ll check the spam comments. And thank you!
@Jada- We did!! I love her so much!! The superbowl was fun! Yeah this group is hilarious!!
@Akua- Yes def get that down!! LMAO!
@ Mik- thx for saying I multi-task correctly!! Jolie does too!!
Hello Treehouse!
I’ve become a regular lurker here and just wanted come out from the shadows and tell you ladies how inspiring I find the conversations taking place here.
re the post: I agree with all 3 and especially find myself confused at a woman who knowingly dates an unavailable man; I mean really, is the world not old enough that we should have learned that lesson by now?
I’m having a good time getting to know myself and trying to open up once again to let others get to know me as well, ’cause I found out I’m kinda awesome
CBG thanks for creating such a space and bringing up some things we may have a hard time facing head on.
Good Morning and welcome Taticia!
Hey Tatica and Welcome!!!
Hey Tatica!!
Welcome to the Treehouse Tatica! We don’t bite so go on and jump out there lady!
Total Random: I was over my homegirl’s mama’s house yesterday on the way to a Superbowl party… .2520s… any-t-who, her electricity is still out, so she has to stay with her mama.
I was sitting in the dining room with my other homegirl (sista) and the dog comes around and just lays down (I thought he was hunching the carpet) and pisses right there.
I chased him and put his nose in it and spanked his butt.
My homegirl, 2520, who OWNS the dog.. did NOTHING. WTF?
@Jada Mwah! – oh, it’s not you all who I think might bite, you seem quite lovely. I’m just working on trying to letting the men back in my life ’cause I took a serious break for a while there.
@ Nicki- WTF! See I wish Mimi and Pedro would do that I would lynch their arses!!!
@Jada Mwah! – oh, it’s not you all who I think might bite, you seem quite lovely. I’m just working on trying to letting the men back in my life ’cause I took a serious break for a while there.
Hon I have been there…kind there right now so I understand. Sometimes you need to take a break from the shenanigans and re-evaluate. And give yourself time to work through whatever issues or things you may be feeling.
BTW…I figured you weren’t talking about us here @ the Treehouse…I was just joshing you!
“@ Nicki- WTF! See I wish Mimi and Pedro would do that I would lynch their arses!!!”
Girl, right… my sista friend was soooo disgusted. She goes, “ole nasty a$$ dog.” I died!!!!!
I told her I could’ve picked him up and thrown him across the room.
@Nick
EEEEWWWWW!
@Nick- That’s exactly what I was thinking!
“@Jada Mwah! – oh, it’s not you all who I think might bite, you seem quite lovely.”
Why did that phrase quite lovely make me smile a bit????!!! That is the cutest phrase chica!
Ladies, she prolly should not have bought those dogs anyway… they just run her all willy nilly bc she doesn’t have time to train. Her new home smells like piss and shat bc SHE LETS THEM DO IT!
Nicki homegirl need to send them to a trainer then!!
Doesn’t she????? Bless her heart. I’ve rethunk my whole dog phase. Notgonnabeabletodoit right now. LOL
It’s a lot of work and dedication!
I am seeing that Holister… I’m so flighty.. girl, I can be really passionate about something one day and then all of a sudden, you won’t hear me mention it again.
LOL.. Kinda like my career goals and this psychology stuff.
Nicki I do understand!! I will leave mimi and pedro in the crate if I dont feel like being bothered!
Good Morning Treehouse…man, this past weekend was a good one. Anyway, I’m gonna go search out some coffee in my kitchen.
@Nikki
“Ladies, she prolly should not have bought those dogs anyway… they just run her all willy nilly bc she doesn’t have time to train. Her new home smells like piss and shat bc SHE LETS THEM DO IT!”
That’s just gross…and not to mention unsanitary. I mean you wouldn’t let a person person squat in your dining room and pee. I don’t know why an animal is any different. Ew.
“That’s just gross…and not to mention unsanitary. I mean you wouldn’t let a person person squat in your dining room and pee. I don’t know why an animal is any different. Ew.”
@Coco: Exactly. I won’t eat over there… or at her house.
@ Nick. 2520’s are notorious for that nasty ish too.
I used to babysit my neighbor’s kids back in the day. They had 2 dogs and 2 0r 3 cats lived in the house.
The lady would make the kids lil finger sandwiches for snacks and leave it on the counter. The cats would be on the counters licking all over the food. Licking in the kids milk glasses and stuff…and they would eat right after it! Talk about NASTY!
If I got hungry I would send for food from my house cause ain’t NO WAY I was eating from them…YUCK!
“The lady would make the kids lil finger sandwiches for snacks and leave it on the counter. The cats would be on the counters licking all over the food. Licking in the kids milk glasses and stuff…and they would eat right after it! Talk about NASTY!”
EWWWWWWW. Yes honey. She is notorious for picking up my glass and drinking it or eating off my plate. I can’t stand it… but I know she doesn’t mean any harm.
EEKK! Jada I cant even eat lunch now!! LOL! but you are right they are pretty nasty….
Hey ya’ll I got an annoucement!!
Holly What!!!!!
holly WHAT YOU GOT TO SAY!? Iz’ waiting
Holly getting some extensions sewn in tomorrow
umm why u just got your hair cut last week chica
“Holly getting some extensions sewn in tomorrow ”
Exciting. I love new hair dos!!!!~ U should post a before and after pic.
i mean like 2 weeks ago
I liked that hair style actually
I didn’t get it cut just changed up the color and I am wearing my bangs… but I am bored and trying not to get it cut, actually trying to grow it out so Im putting it to rest for a while… hopefully I can stand having the hair in….
Agrees with Nick’s before and after.
I had to re dye my hairs this weekend. Twas looking bad.
Morntings ya’ll!
and umm how much are you payin for this?
morning daisy! how’s the boo?
Why do I suddenly feel like susie orman
i feel like im about to say denied or approved lol
Morning Daisy!
@Jada & Nick- Well my Avatar is my before cause currently my hair is curly!! LOL but I will send ya’ll pics when its done!!
@Hey Daisy!
@Mik- Its 95 includes styling as well. I got my hair while I was in Tennessee.
ok i approve
Mik cause you are our Susie Orman…. I know you are shaking your head Jolie and I am sorry but it’s not super long or anything…
Thank you Mik! The costly part was the hair… it was 79 per pack.
@ Mik…I love Susie Orman.
Let me find out you approving and denying up in here.
Jolie…did I not tell ya’ll about that?!? Girl. The boo is non-existant. After me being there for him through all his ish (alcoholism, lack of higher education, horrible money managing skills) my cousin was murdered and he decided to go to the club the night of the funeral instead of being there for me. My mom was also laid off and he accused me of cheating when I had to cancel our plans at the last minute to go and be with her. A hot mess! I’m just mad it took me so long to get up and leave.
On a happier note, there’s a secret crush who I’m trying to work up the nerve to talk to. I got his contact info from one of our mutual friends under the pretense that I wanted to discuss a “job” can’t have folks all up in my business. Now I’m debating do I call or e-mail. And what do I say?
I say email about job in question
Can’t wait to see that pic Holister.
daisy: I’m a punk so I’d prolly email. So you prolly don’t want to follow my advice.
Co-signs Mik’s approach.
@ Daisy- I am with Mik
“Let me find out you approving and denying up in here”
I will in a heart beat lol
susie don’t hold em up
There’s no real job. I just said that as a cover up cause I didn’t want my friend all in my business.
@ Nick- i’ll email it when she’s finish
Ya’ll why is this lady on Judge Mathis suing for “a curling iron, two chickens, and some milk?!?!”
I love working from home
)
@ Daisy…you can tell me to mind mine…but what do you do from home? Working from home is so a goal of mine. And I’m mad at that heffa. I’mma need for her to do better.
@ Holly – I can’t wait to see the pics! I want my hair to grow out soooo bad just so I can get a sew in. For now, I’ve been wearing the demi wigs when my hair needs a break from the heat.
Oh ok Daisy I got chu
I would email him and let him know how u got the info so he won’t think ur a crazy stalker.
Then tell him whats up.
do u already know he is single?
@ Jada. I work in sales so my office is at home but I cover a pretty large territory so I’m usually only ever in my office on Mondays and/or Fridays. All the other days I’m on the road in my company car – heyyyy naw…don’t tell me that MY GOD ain’t good!!!
@ Daisy- yeah I’ll let you know when it’s out! I dont think I have your email… do you have mine?
This is the first time I will be participating in getting extensions… Im kinda nervous!
Hair people
I just found a new hair dresser Friday
she pressed my hair bone straight and cut it. She told me not to put any flat irons on it and so far I have been able to not have it touch a flat iron since Friday!!
I’m gonna go and get it done again on Friday and then do every two weeks after that.
She is like a God sent because every time i have ever gotten my hair done i have always had to touch it up with a flat iron the next day or a few days later. now I might be down to heat on my hair once every two weeks!!
swoon
I am hoping this will help my hair grown along with the trimming of my ends
“Ya’ll why is this lady on Judge Mathis suing for “a curling iron, two chickens, and some milk?!?!””
That may be the ghettoest thing I’ve heard today.
He’s definitely single. We met a few years ago after his divorce at my friend’s party. Since then we’ve run into each other at a couple of events. Always a little flirtation. This last event, he finally worked up the nerve to dance with me and I think I might’ve accidently ruined a nice pair of VS.
“She is like a God sent because every time i have ever gotten my hair done i have always had to touch it up with a flat iron the next day or a few days later. now I might be down to heat on my hair once every two weeks!!
swoon
I am hoping this will help my hair grown along with the trimming of my ends”
Yeah, Mik, a good flat iron can last you about two weeks chica.
“I think I might’ve accidently ruined a nice pair of VS.”
[DEAD]
just let me stay dead ok?
it was nice knowing u folks
@ Holly. I don’t have yours. mine is mz_daisy at hotmail.
I had a sew in when I lived in Houston cause that humidity was HORRIBLE on my hair. I loved it. I’d wake up in the morning do a little fluff fluff shake…thought I was a 2520.
“I think I might’ve accidently ruined a nice pair of VS.”
LMAO! I am kilt.
@Mik- WHOO HOO!! I love people who do your hair good!!
@ Daisy- Gotcha!! and LOL at the VS ruined!! You getting me excited about my weave!! I only got 12 in didnt want it to be too long!!
@ Holly….mine was short to….that’s the perfect way to go if you don’t already have super long hair….
Yeah mine is shoulder length…. I heard it will be a little longer than what my original length was
Daisy you off the chains!
Man that sounds divine. But I hate sales so I know that is not an option for me. I’m always impressed with people who are very good at it. My brother is great at sales. I’m NGBATDI!
@daisy: I say cut the bs and ask the man out for a drink! Just email him .. tell him it was nice seeing him.. maybe you all can get together for a drink.. yada yada
Glad you cut the boo loose.. when people show you who they are… well you know
@daisy: I used to be in sales.. b2b .. govt for telecom.. I MISS WORKING FROM HOME.. I’m trying to get back into it… but I think I might go pharma this time but I dont think its recession proof.. so.. idk..
I’m back for a minute kids.
I wanted to get a weave but I can’t really picture why I’d need one.
Daisy–We can get you some new VS lol
@ Jolie and Jada – It’s not a sales sales position. More so consulting the VPs and CEOs of the companies we work with on how to sell our product. I thought I hated sales too but it’s not so bad. Also, I’ve heard good things about pharm sales so I say go for it!
@ Jolie – I only have his work e-mail. Do you think that’s still appropriate? Maybe e-mail him with my cell # and tell him I have a question? Or just call? I have no problem with calling and actually would prefer to since it gives me more control over the sitch.
“Hello Treehouse!
I’ve become a regular lurker here and just wanted come out from the shadows and tell you ladies how inspiring I find the conversations taking place here.
re the post: I agree with all 3 and especially find myself confused at a woman who knowingly dates an unavailable man; I mean really, is the world not old enough that we should have learned that lesson by now?
I’m having a good time getting to know myself and trying to open up once again to let others get to know me as well, ’cause I found out I’m kinda awesome
CBG thanks for creating such a space and bringing up some things we may have a hard time facing head on.
”
Welcome Tatica…”’cause I found out I’m kinda awesome”. This statement is awesome. I love it. And yes you are. I think the sooner we get that ALL through our heads the sooner we get the love we want and actually deserve, not some other Yaya’s seconds or left overs.
@ Sunny..that whole web cam thing reminds me of Beyonce’s video phone. Trapper John MD suggested it once when he was away. But I considered us to be in a “relationship”..i don’t think i could do that with a random.
@ Daisy “On a happier note, there’s a secret crush who I’m trying to work up the nerve to talk to. I got his contact info from one of our mutual friends under the pretense that I wanted to discuss a “job” can’t have folks all up in my business. Now I’m debating do I call or e-mail. And what do I say”
JESUS BE SOME RESTRAINT. DO NOT CALL OR EMAIL HIM. You’re doing HIS JOB. There is a way to signal interest whereby allowing a man to be a man.
@Jac- Im just resting my hair…
“@ Sunny..that whole web cam thing reminds me of Beyonce’s video phone. Trapper John MD suggested it once when he was away. But I considered us to be in a “relationship”..i don’t think i could do that with a random.”
LMAO.. I HATE that song. I HATE it.
The webcam can be weird… this foo would just stare at me at repeat how beatiful I was… I thought it was freaky.
“@Jac- Im just resting my hair…”
Maybe I should do the same…but I always feel like my hair might come out….
@ Jac- why?
@Holly-I dunno why…I just do…
@Nikki
about the Beyonce video phone thing…I agree that webcam with guys online that you’ve never met is weird. I do use Skype with friends that live out of town.
So the guy who kept repeating how beautiful you are…did you see his cam too or was it one-sided?
I’ve shown my cam with a guy online who didn’t have one a couple times but I told him I felt like I was giving him a show and it just feels weird if he doesn’t have one. I mean, who know’s what he’s doing while “staring” at my cam…ew.
“JESUS BE SOME RESTRAINT. DO NOT CALL OR EMAIL HIM. You’re doing HIS JOB. There is a way to signal interest whereby allowing a man to be a man.”
I agree. Make sure you release extra phermones so he can sniff your backside extra hard.
@KB- Good Afternoon KB
“about the Beyonce video phone thing…I agree that webcam with guys online that you’ve never met is weird. I do use Skype with friends that live out of town.
@Coco: So the guy who kept repeating how beautiful you are…did you see his cam too or was it one-sided?”
It was mostly one sided… simply bc I just had to use it to verify his looks… after that, I thought it was just weird to talk and stare… so I never told him to turn his on. But he ALWAYS did.. he’d call and say, “are you gonna let me see your webcam?” and get mad when I said no. WEIRDO.
“I felt like I was giving him a show and it just feels weird if he doesn’t have one. I mean, who know’s what he’s doing while “staring” at my cam…ew.”
EWWWWW. I agree.. plus I’ve seen one too many movies about psychopaths.
@Holly – What Up? How are you?
“I agree. Make sure you release extra phermones so he can sniff your backside extra hard.”
I am in tears.
@Kb- good and you???
@Holly
I’m good. Just maintaining.
“LMAO.. I HATE that song. I HATE it.
The webcam can be weird… this foo would just stare at me at repeat how beatiful I was… I thought it was freaky.
”
SUNNY so the TRUTH COMES OUT….you DID actually do the web cam thing. And you thought it was weird before or after..LOL..just kidding. I think its sexxy with a man you know and trust and with your clothes on..(most at least).
@ Hummy “I agree. Make sure you release extra phermones so he can sniff your backside extra hard.
”
are you mocking me ?? Hummy??
@Comeback
“are you mocking me ?? Hummy??”
Of course not. I appreciate any woman that knows more about being a man and what a man should do than a actual man. Without you telling me I would have never known.
“Of course not. I appreciate any woman that knows more about being a man and what a man should do than a actual man. Without you telling me I would have never known.”
Hummy….I know right….how long have you been a man? Since August? November?
“SUNNY so the TRUTH COMES OUT….you DID actually do the web cam thing. And you thought it was weird before or after..LOL..just kidding. I think its sexxy with a man you know and trust and with your clothes on..(most at least).”
LMAO! I said I did it Comeback. But I felt weird doing it. I thought it was weird before, but I also wanted to verify looks (I can be shallow) with this whole internet dating stuff. But repeatedly asking is weird… We’d be talking on the phone, but I had my cam up while talking… When I’d get up to walk away, this fool WATCHED… thats were the weirdness ensued. LOL
Sunny-Webcams are so fun…I do one with a friend at least once a day (if i’m decent)
“Of course not. I appreciate any woman that knows more about being a man and what a man should do than a actual man. Without you telling me I would have never known.
”
You’re welcome Hummy!!! I appreciate the appreciation. With all this truth I espouse on the daily, I can’t help but to think you love the yaya’s and the tree house.
seriously though…EVERY MAN that I’ve ever talked to thinks their job is to pursue. Sure some don’t mind a phone call and an email to intiate said pursuit, by what does a woman really gain from that DIRECT chase. I do believe that men and women chase in very different ways. A man chases to catch…and woman chases to get caught. BIG DIFFERENCE.
Now there are men who have non-direct feminine ways of “catching”, and there are very masculine minded women. I don’t know very much about it. Those roles do exist, but a woman has to be careful in that once you become the dominant chaser..you really maintain much of that identity in a relationship, ie you can’t go from “hey i like you let’s go out” to wanting to be very soft and pink. you pretty much have to stay in the lane you are driving in.
I can’t help but to think you love the yaya’s and the tree house.
He loves the yayas and the treehouse…sure…when we’re quiet and behave like good women and of course when we don’t tell him how to be a man I think is what he means…LMFAO that Humble Hamster! Such a little rascal…
What if the email just says hi??
“What if the email just says hi??”
MIK!
If I got an email from s3xy mcs3x and it said:
“hi!”
I’d think he was strange.
@cbg: I guess it all goes back to knowing who you are dating or the person you are dealing with and what kind of man/woman they are in the dating relationship. Some men find it quite attractive when a woman actually asks them out on date 3 or 4. Men want to feel wanted to sometimes… There are other men who want to do all the askin and think that maybe you are pressed if you ask.. I think its all in knowing who you deal with..dontcha think?
So Mikster..you basically send an email that is pretty much blank..no subject line..it just says:
“hi”
first of all if you got all the info and he hasn’t otherwise given you clues that he’s interested..maybe on an off chance …he’s not..i dunno. Its a real stretch.
lol Nicki
ok im just tryin to get around the rules
“first of all if you got all the info and he hasn’t otherwise given you clues that he’s interested..maybe on an off chance …he’s not..i dunno. Its a real stretch”
DEAD
mum knows best
“Some men find it quite attractive when a woman actually asks them out on date 3 or 4. ”
Jolster we aren’t talking about date 3 or 4. Daisy i think is at ground ZERO.
I am talking about intial interest..not say i have these auto show galla tickets. We’d be sitting at the Mercedes table..do you wanna come with me next week?
I guess it all goes back to knowing who you are dating or the person you are dealing with and what kind of man/woman they are in the dating relationship. Some men find it quite attractive when a woman actually asks them out on date 3 or 4. Men want to feel wanted to sometimes… There are other men who want to do all the askin and think that maybe you are pressed if you ask.. I think its all in knowing who you deal with..dontcha think?
I concur Jolster…it really does make sense. I know with me and a certain someone it’s like I will ask and he will ask yanno? I think each person needs to feel wanted and desired.
“lol Nicki
ok im just tryin to get around the rules”
@Mik: Not with that email! LMAO
Ok comeback
so would it be wrong to test your theory/experiment on my co-worker even if im not single?
I really want to test my womanly powers on this new dude
im gonna need instructions
“mum knows best
”
Its bad enough that one of my facebook fans told me i was like an auntie to them..she’s 21..Im not old enough to be anybodys mama. I’ll except auntie.
Asks self the question, “have you ever initiated contact with a man for a date, jolie?”
ponders.. thinks.. ponders..
Answer: Nope, I’m too shy.
But Daisy doesnt seem as shy as moi.. just saying
*backs out of the room..slowly*
@Comeback
“You’re welcome Hummy!!! I appreciate the appreciation. With all this truth I espouse on the daily, I can’t help but to think you love the yaya’s and the tree house.
seriously though…EVERY MAN that I’ve ever talked to thinks their job is to pursue.”
Ok I was being sarcastic. Look every man does not feel it is job to pursue. If a man wants you and he is not shy or with another woman he will step up. But only chauvinist feel its their job to pursue. Their masculinity is fragile so if a woman steps to them it will make them feel less than a man. I never understand why women limit themselves to only men that approach them. Its funny to me b/c most of the dudes that I see that court women are dudes that you really don’t want to deal with. They always get women though because they entertain this way of thinking.
“I really want to test my womanly powers on this new dude
im gonna need instructions
”
I actually am doing my own male experiment in the form of ….well stay tuned LOL..
but sure Mikster have at it..Maybe it would work since everybody seems to know more than me and my personal experience in the form of lots of dating lots of men..Hummy that means im not dating hamsters. I AM DATING MEN. I think that makes me a credible source too. btw..i know you were joking. Kinda.
@Comeback- I think I called you an Auntie or some ish! LOL!
“@Comeback- I think I called you an Auntie or some ish! LOL!
”
it wasn’t you, holister..aren’t you 28..I rebuke that message. Unless you got aunts that were like 5 when you were born.
“Its funny to me b/c most of the dudes that I see that court women are dudes that you really don’t want to deal with”
just because a man approaches you doesn’t mean you have to actually entertain them for one
and for two
As comeback suggest we can still PICK the man we want to approach us if he is in fact interested by giving off those womanly clues without being so blatant
ok comeback thanks for approval but I still need to know what to do he is a new guy and I think I know him from my last job but i can’t fully remember.
last week my one co-worker was tryin to introduce us but I think he was like aye aye don’t do that, and I was ignoring her like I didn’t hear here.
so i need to get his attention on my own
it wasn’t you, holister..aren’t you 28..I rebuke that message. Unless you got aunts that were like 5 when you were born
I have an uncle born in ‘53 and my oldest first cousin was born in ‘54
“so i need to get his attention on my own
”
fish net …black panty hose..
oh wait that was a song…let me marinate, while i do some work.
Hold the phone ya’ll! I took a lunch break and ya’ll up in here discussing alllllll my bidness…j/k.
CBG – I DEFINITELY feel you. This guy and I have been flirting back and forth for some time now. After the last incident, he was going in for the kill but I explained that although a rocky one, I was still “technically” in a relationship.
I don’t feel comfy e-mailing someone at their work e-mail cause I HATE when people do that to me. I think I’m going to call just to catch up since he missed our friend’s NYE party and I missed the Superbowl one.
My first step is the call, his will have to be asking me out.
I’ll keep ya’ll posted.
@Comeback- I dont have any aunts around my age!! LOL!!
Is she even on his radar? How can she even signal interest if, from the sounds of it, there’snot much interaction between them?
@Comeback
“fish net …black panty hose..
oh wait that was a song…let me marinate, while i do some work.”
Morris Day
I take back my comment, there’s been flirting…
Ok cummon be serious!
I don’t ANY interaction with this guy but I do see him, he sits not to far from me
basically what I need him to do is see me in passin n say “don’t I know you”
or
“you look really familiar”
last time we walked past each other we said hi n that was it.
“Is she even on his radar? How can she even signal interest if, from the sounds of it, there’snot much interaction between them?
”
Thats a good question. To me its a delicate balance that require you are actually signaling interest to a “manly man” who isn’t afraid of his “masculinity”…there are guys out there that Hummy describes. a ball of questionmarks and maybe’s. You don’t want a man like that. At least I don’t.
To me the lack of definitiveness always translates. He’s scared of approaching you. He’s scared of defending your honor in front of his homies. He’s scared to take a calculated risk in his own personal career affairs on and on and on.
comeback answer my question!
“Ok cummon be serious!”
I am SERIOUS men are very visual creations…and ummm upon noticing you he isn’t checking out your brilliant mind and how your fabulous self will be out of debt at the end of this year. He doesn’t even see that.
He sees the “fishnets”..
“comeback answer my question!
”
ENGAGE HIS VISUAL SENSE…(post tomorrow)
Ok!!
yep I can do that, oooh this should be fun fun
Oh LAWD…Mik is plotting!
lmao Jada can you see the wheels spinnin in my head?
lol
I just needed an excuse to go shoppin lol
*calling Dave*
hi, I’m calling about Mik…she’s trying to entice a man and I was just wondering if you could approve her $3 to get some fishnets and $4 for some red lipstick
Jada lmao
$7 dollars really now?
cummon
what about like $40?
@Jac- DEAD!! LMAO!
opps that was jaci my bad
Mik-I’m sorry but these things come cheap…I have some excellent lipstick that cost $1.99 and I don’t wear house…but $5 is enough
@ Mik…I would allow a wee bit more than that.
You get 15 bucks…you betta go for whatcha know!
Mik you on a $40 dollar seduction budget?
Jesus be an economic dating stimulus plan.
40 dollars isn’t gonna get you all 5 senses.
Men are very visual, but they all respond to sights and smells too…we’ve touched on touch which is free. Taste is not applicable, unless you gonna buy him a tuna fish sandwich at lunch.
I finally regret tellin yall about Dave
Ok jac you got me
if i can only spend 5 im not spending anything
imma just tie a yellow scarf around my head and run around his desk clucking like a chicken
that will get his attention
Jac got me down to zero dollars
she been watching to many master card commercials
imma just tie a yellow scarf around my head and run around his desk clucking like a chicken
that will get his attention
When Geezuz calls….LAWD I’m bout to bust up into THE UPPER ROOM! (cite: Life)
Mik….yo needs to take your @ss to the corner poste haste!
Mik-I ain’t realize you were doing all five senses….
Well I sent you smell for Christmas…
For taste…give him something vanilla-y (not you cause I know I sent vanilla) so I’m thinking…Cinnabon…I’m visualizing and smelling warm, sweet and gooey…so maybe hot chocolate and some kinda pastry.
For sight…Did you get some pretty earrings to frame that pretty face? And some nice lip gloss you got good lips?
For listening-Talk soft? That’s free right?
For touch…lightly brush against his arm while looking in his eyes to engage for convo?
“imma just tie a yellow scarf around my head and run around his desk clucking like a chicken”
Drafting a quick will..before i croak…This is the SECOND funniest thing I’ve ever read in my God given life.
I can seduce a man all day err’day and not have a dollar. I’m just saying…
Is anyone gonna watch I love money 2 and for the love of ray J…also…the bachelor?
Is anyone gonna watch I love money 2 and for the love of ray J…also…the bachelor?
Ray J = LAME!
lol sorry yall I am headed to the corner right nah….
MIK-I JUST GAVE U IDEAS FEEDBACK PLEASE
Jada-I am going to watch tonight’s episode but I can. not. miss the Bachelor.
Speaking of a black bachelor that’s about something please.
@ Jac – Not watching that Tomfoolery. Although I’ll prolly get sucked in by the media circus that always surrounds those shows.
Did anybody watch the Real World last week? If so, what are your thoughts on the black chick’s singing?
They got a black bachelor??
for serious??
@daisy: She sucks.. SHE CANT SANG!
@Jada
“Ray J = LAME”
Cosign. That dude is a herb. He tries too hard to be cool.
“I can seduce a man all day err’day and not have a dollar. I’m just saying…”
Jac dear we done seen where you’re seductions get you..and aint nobody round these parts tryna get men to break their covenant bonds and engagements with fellow yaya’s..the world is too big and way too karmic for all that. We want to seduce SINGLE MEN. your seductions seem a bit too willy nilly and random.
DEAD
“Jac dear we done seen where you’re seductions get you..and aint nobody round these parts tryna get men to break their covenant bonds and engagements with fellow yaya’s..the world is too big and way too karmic for all that. We want to seduce SINGLE MEN. your seductions seem a bit too willy nilly and random.”
This reminds me where I need to be- ON FRIDAYS BLOG!! WHAT IN THE HEEZY HAPPENED ON HERE FRIDAY???
*Speechless*
awww shat…
clicks the “x”
“*Speechless*
”
In my irkle voice..”what did i say?”
@ Holister..I’ll let Jac explain.
Holly see what had happen was
it was the horse that I rode in on
Jolie don’t chu touch that button
jada pick your bottom lip up off the floor
@CBG- ok
@Mik- What color was it???
@CBG….I think are probably a very good friend to your peeps. I can appreciate anyone’s honesty.
Do I need to go and read all the comments?
jada pick your bottom lip up off the floor
*Wipes drool from chin*
So errrr ummmm….what do would you guys suggest using to make a vision board if you live with someone and want to kinda keep it private?
@ Hollies…yeah that would be a good idea.
what kinda vision board you wanna make?
Holly it was that brown horse off that beer commerical last night
there are different kinds? School me.
About my near future. Desires of my heart, projects I’d like to look into etc.
MIK!! OMG I DIED ON THAT COMMERCIAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
jada what about putting it on the back of the door in the room??
closet maybe?
Still reading over on Fridays post… is there a time I should start focusing on?
@ Mik…don’t work.
If I’m gone…mother feels free to traipse her @ss in my room, so ain’t no telling if she’s snooping or what. Maybe a notebook or something I can lock up somewhere.
And this is yet ANOTHER reason I really wanna leave. I’m just not sure if she’s ready to be alone yet y’know. I may try to bounce when my baby sis comes home from school this summer.
Jac dear we done seen where you’re seductions get you..and aint nobody round these parts tryna get men to break their covenant bonds and engagements with fellow yaya’s..the world is too big and way too karmic for all that. We want to seduce SINGLE MEN. your seductions seem a bit too willy nilly and random.
I need you to go visit my little roster. Not one of them has anyone. In fact, 99% of the men I deal with have no one…I apologize for not being perfect, saintly and clairvoyant. Furthermore, I can’t say that anything I’ve ever done has been willy nilly and random…beyond that some people can just draw men…I happen to be one of them and since men are supposed to do all the pursuing and all that jazz…I might let them pursue but them not being honest and up front has nothing to do with me. A man not being happy with his situation has nothing to do with me. I do not control men…that’s not.my.job. and never d@mn will be. As a matter of fact, if you take a nice long look at a lot of the men we’ve all had dealings with I bet they have skeletons in the closet that we never know anything about.
Thanks.
Ok I am reading from the bottom up and am at 1:22 and I am like WTF and OMG!
“@CBG….I think are probably a very good friend to your peeps. I can appreciate anyone’s honesty.
”
thanks Zsa Zsa..I try..Jac’s comment was a bit BRAZEN. a bit too brazen for my very RECENT recollection.
@ Holly..
Its a long story. But Chris P who was posting early on SSS came over here on Christmas talking about the wonderful gifts he was buying his FIANCE of 4 years. We all thought it was ballin to the max but a cute sentiment just the same.
Friday Chris P comes over here as “the little secret I guess” and plays these “guess who i am” game for 20 minutes. My ADD wasn’t having none of that. So I outed him and his identity ..he was the Chris P who had first posted on SSS and then a few weeks later over here. Friday after outing him he stated that his 4 year love affair was over and the engagement was off. He had very real proof his fiance was “cheating on him”. …Jac referred to him as her psuedo boyfriend.
I asked some very direct and pointed questions of them both. True dat true it was and is none of my business. But if you come over here with all the sordid partial details..im gonna wanna know the exact ones.
hush….
hushhhh
somebodies callin my name…..
[runs out the door]
jada what about having it at work??
wait a minute she was cheating??
I missed that one
@ Mik…not with these nosey, fake, phony GANCHES (cite: Slaus of OHN) I work with!
I might just have to get something like a scrapbook or sum and lock it up somewhere. OR…Maybe I should do it on the computer and have it as my wallpaper. My comp wallpaper is rarely seen by my fam.
@Comeback- Wow…. yeah I am reading the comments it was crazy up in here…. I heard about it but dangnabbit I didnt see it until today….
yes jada computer screen thats a good idea dahlin
im gonna be workin on this obama board/art work hopefully this week if my a.d.d doesn’t ask to spend the night.
I want a Ham sandwich… YUMMO!
“As a matter of fact, if you take a nice long look at a lot of the men we’ve all had dealings with I bet they have skeletons in the closet that we never know anything about. ”
I don’t think I’ve ever argued that was NOT THE CASE. When it comes to mistakes in love. My picture is next to the definition.
Again..you bring it over here. And Imma wanna know exacts.
Wow that weather outside is glorious!
*skips away*
Is it sunny up there Jolie?
[runs behind jolie waving arms around]
“wait for meeeee”
[slips n falls because of the no grip target shoes]
Goes to frolick with the ladies.
I’m sorry did I bring everyone down off their starbuck HIGH…
Jac Im sorry for the harshness but after this statement AND with Friday’s details: “I can seduce a man all day err’day and not have a dollar. I’m just saying…”
you walked me into it. and is not exactly a feather in your hat..to be able to seduce EVERY man.
So Jada what do you think of this new lip gloss I got for a penny?
it is not sunny but its not -8 its about in the 50s ..glorious..
*picks up Mik and dusts her off*
lip gloss for a penny!?
Not a PENNY! You playing in them gumball machines Mik?
Naw CBG…it’s really is a lovely day outside and I wish I was there. It’s 61 degrees out….COME ON SPRING!
”
I’m sorry did I bring everyone down off their starbuck HIGH…
Jac Im sorry for the harshness but after this statement AND with Friday’s details: “I can seduce a man all day err’day and not have a dollar. I’m just saying…”
you walked me into it. And Im further wondering where YOUR personal boundaries are.”
My personal boundaries vary from setting to setting. In fact, some of them are pretty close.
And since I am not going to further bring everyone down…how come that d@mn groundhog saw his shadow?
aww thank you Jolie for pickin me up yes lip gloss for a penny
Jada how did u know I got that out the gum ball machine??
LOL @ Mik! Y’all be good! Catch up with ya! I’m outtie!
And Jac…I don’t believe that groundhog! Spring coming early!
byeeee J boogie disco feva!
Ok Im back… all I gotta say can we not have Friday happen up in here again
It makes me sad…
Holly umm yea it shouldn’t happen again
but I am in agreement still with comeback in that if we so choose to put our info out into blog land we need to be prepared with what comes with that.
I actually don’t think any of us intended to participate in the toomfoolery from Friday but on the brighter side it did make my day go by super fast!
the good the bad and the U-G-L-Y
Holli-Don’t be sad, just call little Jaci after work…cause right now she’s mad @ little Hummi for the lies he told her about this tea.
Mik-Nope it’s important to realize no one intended it.
Where’s 80s?
80’s was in ATL over the weekend. She took the day off
Thanks for reminding me Mik…I can’t remember
Hey ya’ll lets do the Steve Harvey book for bookclub?
YO…. sing along treehouse fam:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFEATMH0YI4&feature=related
chorus starts at 2:19…
Holly-I am with that.
also TD Jakes…Before You Do…
I am currently reading the power of a praying woman…
when i finish i am doing the purpose driven life…
can we read steve harvey for march? or are we doing 1 book every 2 weeks?
@ Holly – I’m on board. Just finished it yesterday…..
Did you Daisy??
Yea, my mom bought it on pre-order. Got it Tuesday and lent it to me Friday. It was a super easy read!
y’all just inspired me to go to the bookstore tonight.. use the giftcard Coach got me for my bday
Jolie, if you’re looking for Steve’s book you may have to get it online. I’ve heard it’s practically sold out everywhere….
YAY for inspiration!
D@mn on Steve’s book
Can we have a schedule?
OMG I love this. I recently met this guy and he keeps saying that I “don’t want to spend any time with him”, yet I have invited him to come with me to be in a parade, go for lunch (sandwich and ice cream), and go to a baseball game. I went to all three outings alone. When I invited him to the baseball game, he said, “I’m not into that team.”…to the parade “I don’t like parades”…to the lunch “it rained…” I told him coming over to my apartment is not hanging out! He said, “oh i thought it was! lol
Anywayz…I passed this on to a few friends!
Thanks Miss Nici for coming by the treehouse. Yes we ladies do not date unavailable men. Its the biggest time waster there is.