When I was two years short of my B.S. my would be GF decided that a guy 14 yrs her senior with four kids and house to go with it was her ideal man. No, stuggling with the child-free, soon to be graduate was just not what she was accustomed to.

And what is she accustomed to?

See her dad brought her car and her grandmother left her a house on Fulton St in Brooklyn.

Yea but she’s an “independent woman”.

Whats disturbing is I have run into hordes of young black women like ole girl.

They state “independence” but omit that they were set up with an Adult Starter Kit. I guess thats why they dont want the guy living with moms as he matriculates out of school and matriculate he did!!!!

To do it I worked the entire ten years it took to get my degree. No car-no handouts, jobs with no benny’s. As I have mentioned I got 1ok worth of film equipment all alone.

The women I dated wanted to support me by buying me clothes (once again our generation cant get off the dick of Materialism..which has got to be one of the Seven Deadly Sins).

So ladies is this how we support one another?

He can move in but not be of any substance. As I said in other replies, ALL of the couples I know that shack its Her pad and She’s got the degree.

Him: An hourly job (usually high teen double digits)-maybe a car (usually top of the line-or in between…but not a hooptie) but dream-plan-college?

Nope…nothing-just work-get paid-sex you and repeat.

He barely got the D in his GED exam, whats his big gotta be “my man” factor?

As long as he is not “real thug-nigga” dangerous and keeps the sex up, its all good…..until the baby is born…and then he gets “funny” and then you realized wow 8yrs, an innocent life throw into the fire and NOW you see he NEVER loved you.

As I said before I know more degreed baby mothers having the baby right after college and the BD is looong gone. Than I know young uneducated women having babies.

Status maybe middle class but priorities are ghetto…and what do you say to the kid?

“No I never loved your father/mother you were only born cause….”

I could never understand how some sisters make strugglin with a brother and yall both in the same boat above her time and attention. How come we cant eat Raman Noodles together and share the sweet tea in your place this week and then my place next week? Or combine the best of our interest and meet in the middle?

Now I think-with my accomplishments and all, some women are really feeling my “Stats” she wasnt there for the struggle-oh how convenient.

I always thought its “what are you struggling for” that made the difference.

Think on it you got women up here saying they wont date a brother that makes such and such (but never state Why he is making too low of an income he could saving “seed money” for his business) but they get with his Dumb Ass Counterpart who has just enough “stuff” to provide the excuse to choose him.

Then come to find that “Dumb Ass”-only cares about himself…lets see the Escalade-PSP and PS3 and every pair of Timbs and sneakers ever plus his closet is full of sports apparel but he dont own a suit none of this didnt give you pause that CEO materail he is not?

You want to know what a man is about two things:

What was the LAST thing he read and what does he FREQUENTLY read. Two; what is he willing to sacrifice to get his dream..of course he has to have a dream and the plan to back it up. If he is any kind of leader it will be shown in the lit that he reads and if aint reading NOTHING then thats your “boo”.

“Remember we are the “remote control-gotta have it now-microwave generation”. If it aint happening when we arrive something must be wrong with it!!!
”

this post is coming seriously MONDAY. I’m not looking for a man to come to me ready to run in 2012. With ALL his shyt together on the NY times best seller, running 10 business, teachin at harvard business. Namely because I want to be by his side getting those things. Loving the process. the destination is no real fun. the process is.

BUT

there are attributes…real attributes that translate into HOH, a great boyfriend, an even A better life partner/husband, to me which pretty much dang near ensures the above.

and we miss them time and time again

Great line here. I wonder do the women that allow men to stay in their pads while they continue to screw up think that whatever goal they had in that realtionship was obtainable or did they sell themselves short for convenience?

Or as Comeback said was he “HOH material” or was he just instant dick?

I say that to say lets look at “The Obama’s” as a couple.

Black boys are always ridiculed for being smart or intellectual. Yet Michelle married a man with two Ivy League degrees…not because of his street pedigree or he looks like he can kick a nigga ass!!!.

However todays very impatient AMERICAN women wants Barak to be President Ready when she arrives on campus. Yet to become who Barak is took 47 years!!!! In our current culture America for some reason doesnt like Intellects, and it isnt new. In Raisng In The Sun, Poiter’s character lambast his sisters date (George with the “faggoty white shoes”) who is of course a college student.

I also feel our communites discourage black boys from being intellectual-I was teased by girls and boys but I fought the boys but the girls well it took a loooong time-say to high school for them to see that being smart had nothing to do with my manhood. IMO it made it better.

Perhaps this victory will kill the dumb shit about how “I did it and I didnt go to college” well nice but everyone I know with out a college degree has the average life (and skill set) to go with it (I am a native and resident of NYC).

Also maybe dudes will stop pimping their education to get some on the side…I didnt vote for Barack cuz he ’s got degrees I voted for him because any intellect knows he knows nothing at all. He will surround himself with experts in their respective fields (as opposed to Bush appointing “Brownee” to the FEMA role yet he was horse trainer prior to it).

He will (and did so during the banking crisis) ASK questions, (something you women fail to do when in love with these “no good men”) just because you are “in” doesnt mean you stop asking questions.

In the end, this moment should also remind us that how he got here was through sheer sacrifice.

How many of us up here are ready to support a SO through such a task?

Remember we are the “remote control-gotta have it now-microwave generation”. If it aint happening when we arrive something must be wrong with it!!!

Hmmm…

Man it’s like 80 degrees here

This was funny as hell….

so was your insult about the Stevie Wonder third eye Hum