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Comeback Kids-hey. So I promised to lay off the love posts. Am I a blog freak to play up to my readership? I mean there are more things that I want to get back to-as I make my huge Comeback. My second love is money and success. I haven’t written about core business topics in a while. But everytime I think about my upcoming business posts-somebody takes me back to “love and dating”. Perhaps its that basic need to be loved-even once people have mastered self-love and all the inner work that it entails (or not).

So I was chatting it up with my old friend “R” a few days ago. We met at work over 8 years ago. She was like a big sister (3 years my senior) rocking the world of engineering and consulting. I was just  starting out as a project engineer and the youngest in our department. And she already had her MBA and was doing alot of consulting work on the side. And her dating life sucked.

And at 35, her love/dating life still sucks. She lamented about meeting men online. ”R” said, “I’m just so trusting, I expect everyone to tell the truth. Men online seem to be a bunch of liars.”

I reminded her about the quote our director boss used to always use, particularly always looking at me-since I was the gullible,  just out of college ”they said they would have it to us by Friday” dumbass.  It was a Ronald Reagan quote. Dave would always use. He would say “Comeback Girl, Billing, IT, Marketing all have good intentions… ”Trust But Verify”. Ronny’s quote always stuck to me even outside of project goals and implementation. It’s highly applicable for dating too.

I reminded her of a basic concept:  Google is your friend. So are online court documents. When I was doing my light breezy dating (with diversified online perusing) and had not slowed the party down with “O”,  I knew within the first week if a guy was telling me the truth about children or lack there of, warrants, arrests, sexual offenses (courtesy of county/state sex offender sites) and marital status.

I also used alot of common sense for the rest at appropriate time intervals (note I never let the sun set too long on stupid ). 2 weeks go by (we’ve been on 3 or 4 dates) and you haven’t offered alternate ways of reaching you, ie (home/work/skype/pigeon) You only call during the day AND (when I return a missed call at 8-10:30pm) you are NEVER available. Bonus- you rarely ever make PLANS to date. Its a “Hey Comeback whatchu doin, wanna meet for drinks in an hour”-and its 9pm. Those are all HELL NOs. Use your inner knowing when the above are in isolation. Sometimes its just a guy who likes a slower pace-most times you have a problem. Big ups to God’s given intuition and your inner knowing. Thumbs down to ignoring it and giving benefits of the doubt for more than a couple of weeks.

Two things I LOVE about Ronald Reagan (his aiport-rarely ever delays at DCA and “trust but verify”.)